Unless you’re a model or something…or I don’t know, an olympic swimmer…it’s not okay to shave your ass. This goes for guys and girls, but it’s a little more understandable for women. We aren’t supposed to have hair back there. But again, if you go to all that trouble and you aren’t showing off your behind for money, you’re a stupid person. A stupid, stubbly assed person. Shame on you.

I can’t even imagine the flexibility required to shave one’s own ass. It’s gotta be awkward with all the bending and cheek lifting and what not, not to mention the possibility of catching something with the razor that wasn’t meant to be shorn. Yuck.

What about ingrown hairs? I get them on my legs and they hurt like shit, what about on your ass? What about under the cheek? Oh Gods I feel faint.